Razzo Hall Gradually Collects Dust

Last Thursday, the entrance to the fabled Razzo Hall was unearthed for the first time in a long while. Workers fixing yet another sewer pipe accidently broke into the space, only to discover a thick layer of dust and the remains of a past presidential lecturer.

The event space is now known to be located across the barren tundra called Downing Street, in a larger, yet less mythical place known as the Traina Center. Further excavations might begin soon. We don’t really know.

First-Year Jonah, who asked for his last name to be excluded, was approached about the topic. “Wait like the girl from Grease? I’m confused.” We tried to explain, but he just walked away in a continued state of befuddlement.

The venue is somewhat of a legend. Its padded seats, wood paneled walls, and soft lighting remind the viewer of better times, filled with happiness, grape wine, and of course iambic pentameter. A new FYI course for the fall has been proposed, simply to educate new students on the place. Strangely, it is set to be taught through the management department.

Razzo Hall has also had its share of dark times. Veteran college students may remember the deadly trombone accident of 2008, or the violent poet stampede of 2014. Richard Blanco still remains missing.

It has long been speculated as to what Razzo Hall is actually used for nowadays. Midnight cultic rituals and TED Talk orgies have not been ruled out entirely. It is also possible that literally nothing happens in there, but the question is still up in the air.

Thursday’s discovery made student groups on campus, who are always fighting over other venues in which to hold their events, very excited. Victoria Bloom, the leader of some important club, asked Clark about using the space. “The office assistant just looked at me, completely baffled. When she got her supervisor, the woman laughed at me and handed me a pamphlet about Jefferson 218.” Bloom said in an interview.

For now it looks like much of the dust will be staying in Razzo Hall; although, the presidential lecturer’s bones were given a proper burial. The issue lives on, but most of The Freudian Slip’s staff have forgot about it by now.

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