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Friendships for Entire College Experience Ride on Week One

  • Alexander Vesenka
  • Aug 25, 2015
  • 2 min read

Clark University’s Week One is filled with vital new information for incoming First-Years. However, a majority of the orientation experience is spent getting to know classmates and soul mates.

It can be difficult going through the initial steps of the college experience without friends to lean on. The four years of higher education are a rigorous balance of work, sleep, nutrition, and crop tops. If a student has friends, he can briefly converse with them over a slice of pizza or while the professor’s back is turned. If these friends do not exist, that pizza will be awfully lonely.

The Freudian Slip found First-Year student Sarah Coture (‘19), who was sitting disheartened on the 3rd floor of the library last Sunday night. “What I didn’t understand was that after Week One, there is literally no time to make friends. Now I have no one, and I don’t have any time to meet people. I just wish I had sat down with more strangers at breakfast.”

Of course, new students are not completely left alone when finding their college friends. Clark University attempts to pair like-minded people into each Week One PA group. As an additional resource, peer advisors are there to advise students on which of their peers are cool enough and could be valuable friends.

Natalie Newman (‘17), acapella campus celeb and peer advisor, describes herself as ‘quite sufficient’ at her job. Newman told The Freudian Slip,“I have a 94% success rate in forming friendships between hip first-years. I even hooked up two couples last year that are still together. How about that?”

Still, for the Class of 2019, none of this matters anymore. Week One is over and all potential friends that can be made have been made. For students like Coture, there is always graduate school.

 
 
 

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Hipster Quote of the Week:

The message at the end of “The Tortoise and the Hare” isn’t that ‘slow and steady wins the race’, but actually a well-remembered quote from the 1977 Disney classic “A New Hope”: “Great kid! Don’t get cocky”. Bullshit that the hare was gonna lose that race if he didn’t choose to stop for a nap and a snack and whatever else he did. Bullshit that the tortoise was going to catch up in any capacity if the hare didn’t slow down for him. Maybe that platitude makes sense, but definitely not in this situation.

 

A race is a sheer contest of speed. No other skills go into that. The tortoise and the hare aren’t making miniature wooden horses and getting judged on the craftsmanship of their products alongside their finish time; they are moving from one point to another. In no universe does slow and steady win that race. Slow and steady wins no races, except for races where the point is to go as slow as possible. Even in cases where slow and steady could be considered a possible alternative to fast, such as the aforementioned miniature-wooden-horse-making competition, someone who can do similar quality work at a much faster pace still wins that competition.

 

Slow and steady does not win the race. Not being too full of yourself does.."

 

~Nick Gilfor

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