Obama Promises Last Act in Office Will be “Dope as Fuck.”

President Barack Obama released a statement this morning, in which he made a very ambitious promise regarding the end of his presidency. Obama has promised the nation that his last act as the country’s leader will be “dope as fuck.”

This a lofty goal, even for a seasoned politician such as Obama. Anything that is deemed “dope as fuck” must be truly the gnarliest of the gnarly, a term only applicable to the country’s most notable statesmen, such as the radical George Washington or the dope Teddy Roosevelt. Many political analysts are concerned that Obama’s promise was exceedingly bold, if not dangerous. “If he fails to achieve maximum levels of dopeness, he’ll forever be labeled as a major dork.”

Despite the worries of a few experts, most Americans are excited for the promised final act. A recent wave of theories soon hit the internet. The most popular guesses are a new state of the art skate park in the Rose Garden and government-mandated Parkour lessons.

President Obama has remained silent on the nature of the event thus far, but all signs point to a totally epic departure.

#Global