7 Back to School Tips For Claiming Your Space in the Library

With classes back in session and the library starting to become the local hotspot, laying claim to your territory is no easy task. With every batch of inquisitive and studious First Years comes a slew of hidden predators, waiting to snatch that cozy corner you call “my spot”. Have no fear! I’m here to teach you how to keep those precarious paws out of your comfortable nooks once and for all.

1) The Hibachi

Who says the library is only used for studying. The number one tactic I recommend is to set up a Hibachi table (chef & batteries not included). Plug that bad boy into the wall, pull out some spatulas, and make some onion volcanoes. Not only will you be the star of the kitchen, you’re guaranteed to have enough food to last through the apocalypse.

2) The Rotation Schedule

Before you begin, make sure you are carrying multiple pairs of undergarments you have no real care or concern for. This step involves leaving a rotating schedule of unmentionables. If you can’t be bothered to pick up your own clothes from the bedroom floor, what chance does any random Clarkie have of picking up what looks like dirty delicates from your cozy corner.

3) The Garden of Eden

Get your green thumbs out and dig your shovels into Tip #3. This one involves turning your studying sanctuary into an agricultural wonderland. Trees; flowers; heck, you could even throw a cactus or two into the mix. No one will dare touch your spot once you’ve planted your roots in it. Who knows, it may even help you breathe easier when midterms come your way.

4) The Indiana Jones

Did someone say booby traps? No? Well, someone should have. Make sure to secure the perimeter before you set up a giant boulder. I personally recommend the classic “pull book from the shelf to activate”, but the weighted pressure plate works too. Once in place, sit back, relax, and watch the student body rock and roll with terror as they reenact your favorite scene from Indiana Jones.

5) Calling “Fives”

They have to respect it. If you call “fives” on a spot, every person in the vicinity is honor bound by the heavens to respect your fives. You said it fair and square. There are no take backs. You signed a roommate agreement; you know the rules. Alternative lingo includes, but is not limited to:

“Hosey”

“Dibs”

“By the Hoary Hosts of Hoggarth, this chair is claimed”

6) The Haunting Hour

Rumors are like wildfire; they spread and make Oregon undesirable to visit. Clark is a small school with an even smaller population. Don’t be afraid to use that to the utmost advantage. Start with an offhand comment, a story about a stolen laptop, or even mention the fact that someone has died in your spot and impersonate a ghost for greater effect. The better your story telling, the quicker it’ll spread. Unfortunately, in this day in age, everyone needs proof. Noise machines, spiderwebs, those creepy twins who talk and dress in unison; whatever it takes to convince those squatters that an exorcist is the only option left. Before you know it, an entire section of the library has been quarantined and the Ghostbusters have been summoned to clean up your ghostly gossip.

7) Friends

Let’s be honest, we wouldn’t be able to survive the gigantic workloads, the stressful hours, and the various hardships without the friends we’ve made. They have your back when it’s pressed against the wall and there’s no one else you’d rather turn to for help. Wherever you choose to sit, as long as your friends are in the area, any spot will feel like home. On the other hand, wandering around the library with a large enough group is pretty intimidating and you’re almost guaranteed to scare away anyone who dares to sit in your spot.

Hopeful with these tips and tricks, your cozy corner will remain under your watch. I can’t make your classes easier, but I can make the library feel a little more homey.

#Local #Advice